‘Divorce’ Jackie Kay

1. ‘Divorce’Jackie Kay

2. What Can You Do at What Age in Scotland? Look at the information you have been given and answer the questions: How old do you have to be to… • Give blood? ___ • Buy wine, beer, cider or perry (i.e. Babycham), to drink in a restaurant, only with a meal? ___ • Supervise a learner driver (so long as you've had your licence for at least 3 years)? ___ • Work up to eight hours per day, and 35 hours per week during holidays? ___ • Get married / enter into a civil partnership? ___ 17 16 21 15 16

3. 16 18 16 16 • Get a piercing without parental/guardian consent? ___ • Become liable to register and pay the Council Tax? ___ • Be legally responsible for babysitting? ___ • Leave home without your parents/guardians’ consent? ___ • If adopted, get information about your natural parents? ___ • Buy a National Lottery ticket or scratch card? ___ • Be found guilty of a criminal offence? ___ • Hold a license to drive a car, small motorcycle or tractor? ___ • Get a full-time job and pay National Insurance? ___ • Have the right to decide on your own adoption, i.e. the adoption cannot go ahead without your agreement? ___ 16 16 8 17 16 12

4. 12 18 18 • Be the subject of an ASBO? ___ • Buy cigarettes & tobacco? ___ • Be tattooed? ___ • Get a job on a Saturday for up to 5 hours, and for no more than 2 hours on school days? ___ • Be sent to an adult prison? ___ • Buy alcohol in licensed premises and consume alcohol in a bar? ___ • Join a social networking site (i.e. facebook, twitter)? ___ • Buy or possess fireworks? ___ 24. Leave school? ___ 25. Be sent to a young offenders' institution? ___ 14 21 18 13 18 16 16

5. Discuss • At what age is a child legally able to make decisions for themselves? • Do you think this is the correct age? • Should teenagers be allowed to divorce their parents? • What problems / advantages might arise from divorcing one’s parents? • Other than parents, who could / should have responsibility for a teenager’s affairs?

6. Can children divorce their parents? While it is unusual for children to divorce parents, the fact is that the laws in many lands do make provisions for this type of legal severance of the obligations that exist between parent and child. Known as emancipation, the process makes it possible for children to sever ties with their parents when specific circumstances are present. If the court of jurisdiction determines that it is in the best interests of the minor child for the divorce to take place, the decree is granted and the parents no longer have any claim to or responsibility for the minor child.

7. Can children divorce their parents? When minors choose to divorce parents, there must be compelling reasons for the emancipation to be granted. Often, the reasons include evidence of some type of abuse or neglect on the part of the parents. Along with a demonstrated lack of responsible parental behavior, the minor child must meet several basic requirements before any court will consider an action grant emancipation. The child must be at least 14 years of age, have a reliable source of income, and be able to manage the income in a responsible manner. While it is not always necessary for the child to no longer live with the parents, courts generally prefer for the parents to consent to this stipulation. Story 1Story 2

8. Celebrities who ‘divorced’ their parents A child star being emancipated from his or her parents is certainly not a new trend in Hollywood. It has been happening for years, and it still happens today. Sometimes when a child star makes it big, the fame and fortune can be all too tempting for stage parents who want to get their hands on the cash. The option of ‘divorcing’ your parents, then, can often be a safety net for vulnerable child earners. However, in some circumstances emancipation is a mutual agreement between parent and teen star, where the latter wishes to avoid child labourlaws that prevent him or her from working on set for longer than eight hours a day. It seems the instances of rebellious Hollywood teens being emancipated from their parents over mismanaged money and bad parenting are the only cases that make the headlines, but there are just as many cases of emancipation for more positive reasons.

9. Celebrities who ‘divorced’ their parents MacaulayCulkinwasone of the biggest child stars of the 90s thanks to his starring roles in the Home Alone films, My Girl and Richie Rich. However, his meteoric rise to fame and cash windfall made for an uneasy relationship between the child star and his parents. At age 16, Culkin filed a lawsuit to be emancipated from his parents because he claimed they had mismanaged his income earned from film and TV projects. Culkin won the case and his parents had to pay him $17 million.

10. Celebrities who ‘divorced’ their parents DrewBarrymore’srelationship with her parents showed signs of being a troubled one early on, as she started to develop rebellious characteristics at a shockingly young age; she was smoking and drinking alcohol in public by the age of eleven. “When I was a kid, everything was so unplanned, my parents were so erratic, and my world was so inconsistent,” Barrymore said. She saw her parents as a bad influence and, following time in rehab, Barrymore was successfully emancipated from her parents at just 15 years old. Her father has since passed away, and she is estranged from her mother.

11. Celebrities who ‘divorced’ their parents Juliette Lewis was emancipated from her parents at age 14 but there is, in fact, no ill will at all between Lewis and her parents. Lewis’ parents actually were in favourof her being emancipated and helped her to do so. The reason was so that she could further her career, avoiding restrictive child labor laws. By being emancipated she was allowed to work longer than eight hours a day if she wanted to. Lewis says her parents are fantastic, so this is one rare example of child emancipation that had nothing to do with bad blood.

12. Celebrities who ‘divorced’ their parents Other celebrities who have divorced their parents include: • Ariel Winter (‘Modern Family’) • Michelle Williams • Jenna Malone (‘The Hunger Games’ films) • Alicia Silverstone • Rose McGowan • Eliza Dushku • Aaron Carter • Courtney Love • Corey Feldman

13. Sequencing You are going to work in pairs / groups to reassemble the cut up poem. Hints: The poem has… • two stanzas • 14 lines in each stanza (like a sonnet) • rhyming couplets at the end of each stanza • alternating line lengths • parallel and repeated structures (eg ‘There are parents …’)

14. Here is the whole poem: Divorce I did not promise to stay with you till death do us part, or anything like that, so part I must, and quickly. There are things I cannot suffer any longer: Mother, you never, ever said a kind word or a thank-you for all the tedious chores I have done; Father, your breath smells like a camel’s and gives me the hump; all you ever say is: ‘Are you off in the cream puff, Lady Muck?’ In this day and age? I would be better off in an orphanage. 5 10

15. 15 Here is the whole poem: I want a divorce. There are parents in the world whose faces turn up to the light who speak in the soft murmur of rivers and never shout. There are parents who stroke their children’s cheeks in the dead of night and sing in the colourful voices of rainbows, red to blue. These parents are not you. I never chose you. You are rough and wild, I don’t want to be your child. All you do is shout and that’s not right. I will file for divorce in the morning at first light. 20 25

16. Don’t take that tone with me! You are going to work together to examine different registers and how these are created. (In English, a register is a variety of a language used for a particular purpose or in a particular setting.) You are going to roll the dice to select a random audience and purpose, taking turns to be the speaker. Discusshow your use of language changes according to audience.

17. Don’t take that tone with me! Having discussed the difference between formal and informal registers, work through the poem in pairs, highlighting examples of formal and informal language in two colours. Discuss: • How does the mixed register of the poem make the speaker sound? • How accurately does the poem portray teenage outrage and certainty? • To what extent the poem is serious / humorous?

18. Now we are going to look at the poem with annotations. Colour code your copy of the slides as we go.

19. ‘Divorce’ is about a teenager who wants the power to leave her parents. It is melodramatic and humorous, but overall there is a serious message about independence and freedom of choice. exaggerated or overemotional funny

20. Overview notes • The poem has two stanzas and one stanza break which reflects the idea of divorce / splitting. • Each stanza has 14 lines with an end rhyming couplet. which is an ironic adoption of a loose sonnet form and its associations with romantic poetry. • Alternating line lengths reflect the theme of contrast and difference between the speaker and parents.

21. Overview notes • The poem is the only one of the six selected which is from a collection of poetry for young people, rather than an adult collection. • The poem is closest to a dramatic monologue in the style of Robert Browning: • the speaker’s words are addressed to a present but silent audience; • their words help to characterise the speaker; • there is a clear disparity between what the speaker says about their situation and what the reader infers.

22. Stanza 1 Formal register created through language and grammar. Divorce I did not promise to stay with you till death do us part, or anything like that, so part I must, and quickly. There are things 5 I cannot suffer any longer: Mother, you never, ever said a kind word or a thank-you for all the tedious chores I have done; Father, your breath 10 smells like a camel’s and gives me the hump; all you ever say is: ‘Are you off in the cream puff, Lady Muck?’ In this day and age? I would be better off in an orphanage.

23. Repetition of ‘I’ throughout creates an overly forceful tone, as if she is making a formal statement or announcement. • it is deliberately theatrical and grand. Divorce I did not promise to stay with you till death do us part, or anything like that, so part I must, and quickly. There are things 5 I cannot suffer any longer: Mother, you never, ever said a kind word or a thank-you for all the tedious chores I have done; Father, your breath 10 smells like a camel’s and gives me the hump; all you ever say is: ‘Are you off in the cream puff, Lady Muck?’ In this day and age? I would be better off in an orphanage.

24. This is almost a reversal of the traditional wedding vow. Divorce I did not promise to stay with you till death do us part, or anything like that, so part I must, and quickly. There are things 5 I cannot suffer any longer: Mother, you never, ever said a kind word or a thank-you for all the tedious chores I have done; Initially, the reader expects this poem to be about parents divorcing. However, Kay reverses this assumption as she quickly informs us it is actually a child who wishes to divorce her parents.

25. The dated phrase also gives the lines a degree of humour. Divorce I did not promise to stay with you till death do us part, or anything like that, so part I must, and quickly. There are things 5 I cannot suffer any longer: Mother, you never, ever said a kind word or a thank-you for all the tedious chores I have done; The speaker then uses inversion: “so part I must, and quickly”. The language takes an archaic form, suggesting a romantic poet or Shakespeare. The speaker is trying to sound serious and elevated - possibly trying to use official sounding, or legal language, to match the idea of a divorce.

26. The formal use of “Mother” (and then “Father”) adds to the mock serious tone, as if they were being addressed in a court of law. Divorce I did not promise to stay with you till death do us part, or anything like that, so part I must, and quickly. There are things 5 I cannot suffer any longer: Mother, you never, ever said a kind word or a thank-you for all the tedious chores I have done; This is emotiveand builds up expectation of a tragic ordeal, so it is surprising to discover the cause of this anguish.

27. Divorce I did not promise to stay with you till death do us part, or anything like that, so part I must, and quickly. There are things 5 I cannot suffer any longer: Mother, you never, ever said a kind word or a thank-you for all the tedious chores I have done; Ironic role reversal. This is a parody (a comic imitation) of the stereotypical complaint from mother to child that her daily housework goes unnoticed and unthanked.

28. The father uses humourto deal with his daughter’s angst. For the reader this appears affectionate, but it proves to be infuriating for the speaker. She finds his expressions tiresome and embarrassing. Father, your breath 10 smells like a camel’s and gives me the hump; all you ever say is: ‘Are you off in the cream puff, Lady Muck?’ In this day and age? I would be better off in an orphanage. Pun on “camel” and “gives me the hump”. “all you ever say” – suggests perhaps the speaker is prone to strops like this regularly. Jovial voice of father contrasts with stroppiness / seriousness of speaker. “Lady Muck” – suggests speaker is seen as theatrical by father.

29. This echoes the idea of her rejecting her parents altogether – the ‘divorce’ of the title. Father, your breath 10 smells like a camel’s and gives me the hump; all you ever say is: ‘Are you off in the cream puff, Lady Muck?’ In this day and age? I would be better off in an orphanage. Ironic role reversal – sounds like something a parent would say to a child. The speaker is using her parents’ language to criticise them in the same way as they may have done to her. Overblown, theatrical, over the top – this ends the stanza on a melodramaticnote. This reminds us of the kind of thing teenagers say when fighting with parents (i.e. ‘I wish I’d never been born’ … ‘I wish you weren’t my parents’).The reader can imagine her stomping off, slamming the door after her.

30. 15 I want a divorce. There are parents in the world whose faces turn up to the light who speak in the soft murmur of rivers and never shout. 20 There are parents who stroke their children’s cheeks in the dead of night and sing in the colourful voices of rainbows, red to blue. A blunt toneis created by this simple, assertive statement. Its succinctness and simplicity suggests she is definite on this - the decision is final. This marks a shift in tone – the second stanza becomes more serious /earnest / poetic in tone.

31. 15 I want a divorce. There are parents in the world whose faces turn up to the light who speak in the soft murmur of rivers and never shout. 20 There are parents who stroke their children’s cheeks in the dead of night and sing in the colourful voices of rainbows, red to blue. This is a seriesof idealised images of parents which she would like to have. The repetitionof ‘there are parents’ is ironic: there aren’t, these parents are unrealistic and idealised. In contrast to the speaker, the reader realises that such parents do not exist.

32. This suggests that she wants parents who have no secrets. 15 I want a divorce. There are parents in the world whose faces turn up to the light who speak in the soft murmur of rivers and never shout. 20 There are parents who stroke their children’s cheeks in the dead of night and sing in the colourful voices of rainbows, red to blue. The language used echoes the fantastical descriptions of fairy tales, children’s stories or nursery rhymes – this underscores the speaker’s juvenile naivety and lack of worldly understanding.

33. These parents are not you. I never chose you. 25 You are rough and wild, I don’t want to be your child. All you do is shout and that’s not right. I will file for divorce in the morning at first light. The exaggerated, grandiose tone returns. The short, declarative statements convey childishness and slight petulance / stroppiness. This description of her parents as beinglike uncivilised animalsand always shouting is improbable. It seems fantastical and jars with the earlier impression of her father, whose words suggested a good-humoured man.

34. These parents are not you. I never chose you. 25 You are rough and wild, I don’t want to be your child. All you do is shout and that’s not right. I will file for divorce in the morning at first light. Irony – the speaker is the one coming across as rough and wild. The accusative tone suggests it might be being shouted at the parents. “Wild” here also makes us think of an unruly child. Could this be a phrase that has been used about the speaker? Or is this a role reversal, where the parents act like children and their daughter must take on the role of responsible adult?

35. This suggests an unshakeable certainty about right and wrong, reflecting her naivetyand limited world experience. These parents are not you. I never chose you. 25 You are rough and wild, I don’t want to be your child. All you do is shout and that’s not right. I will file for divorce in the morning at first light. The poem ends with a grand / dramatic / over the top ultimatum. “File for divorce” is another legal expression whichsuggests that the child is trying to sound grown-up to convey the strength of her feelings and to be taken seriously. The end rhyme between “right” and “light” adds emphasis to her intentions.

36. These parents are not you. I never chose you. 25 You are rough and wild, I don’t want to be your child. All you do is shout and that’s not right. I will file for divorce in the morning at first light. The mention of “morning” and “first light” implies that in the morning all will be forgotten (and calls to mind phrases such as ‘everything will look better in the morning’ and ‘you’ll see things in a different light’). Yet, despite the assertive tone used here, the reader could be left wondering whether the poem is an angry response to a specific incident - a mood that will blow over. Or is there something more - a more serious problem or an ongoing situation that has provoked such an extreme reaction?

37. Tone The poem carries a hint of teenage melodrama (it is exaggerated / overemotional) in its often absolute and assertive tone. Some of the lines sound like hurtful words shouted in a childish tantrum: “I cannot suffer / any longer” “I don't want to be your child” However, stanza two suggests there is a more serious message behind this rather comical tone. There is something poignant(evoking a keensense of sadnessorregret)about the way in which the speaker wants her parents to have faces that “turn / up to the light”, as if her current family lacks honesty and openness.

38. Tone She also wants them to “speak in the soft murmur of rivers / and never shout”. This implies that perhaps the parents’ relationship is angry and bitter. The fact that they shout is repeated at the end of stanza two. Again, this disturbs the reader, despite the humorous ending as the teenager adopts ‘adult’ speak: “I will file for divorce in the morning at first light.”

39. Form and Structure The girl addresses her parents directly, so that the poem resembles a dramatic monologue. She reveals and implies details about her parents and her own character. By using this form, Kay is able to remain ambivalent (having mixed feelings or contradictory ideas about something or someone) about the exact nature of the girl’s feelings and the difference between what she tells us and reality.

40. Form and Structure Sonnet variation The poem is written in two 14 lines stanzas, each one with a rhyming couplet (two lines of the same length that rhyme and complete one thoughtat the end): “In this day and age? I would be better off in an orphanage.” “and that’s not right. I will file for divorce in the morning at first light.” We could see them as a variation on the sonnet, a form traditionally associated with love poetry. In using this form, Kay could be commenting ironically on the girl’s situation - it is very much a poem about being ‘out of love’ and severing ties.

41. Form and Structure Line length The line length in this poem is also significant. The variation introduced by alternating between short lines and long lines throughout each stanza perhaps reflects the differences and gap in understanding between parents and child. The brevity of the short lines adds impact to the very forceful statementssuch as “I cannot suffer”, “I want a divorce”, “You are rough and wild”. This allows them to resonate(evoke a feeling of shared emotion or belief)with the reader. The effect of the stop-start, rather stilted nature of the lines may suggest to the reader a breakdown in communication. Perhaps this is the true problem the girl has with her parents.

42. Themes Adolescence The speaker is clearly a teenager. Her father teases her for being huffy: “Are you off in the cream puff, Lady Muck?” This suggests that either she is moody and does not communicate with her parents, or that they fail to take her concerns and emotions seriously. Tone The overall tone of the poem is one of melodrama. The speaker exaggerates and complains about a situation that does not appear to be that difficult. This heightened response could be viewed as typical of a teenager at a time in life when parents often seem increasingly embarrassing and irritating.

43. Themes Adolescence The predominant use of “I” throughout the poem gives a sense of the teenager’s introversion and self-centredness. This could contribute to a breakdown in communication between her and her family. The idealised vision of perfect parents in stanza two is naïve and fantastical - as if the speaker is still too young to understand that what she is demanding is impossible and unreal. Behind the humour of this poem, there is a more serious point being made about independence and how young people should be allowed more of a say in decisions that will affect their future.

44. Themes Family relationships Kay explores one of her regular themes, the nature of the parent-child relationship in this poem. The speaker is annoyed by her parents and wants to be away from them. She feels she is not acknowledged. She is embarrassed and tired of how her father talks to her in a way that shows no understanding of her. She seeks the ideal and is disappointed when her parents do not fit with her fantasy. Lack of communication seems to be at the heart of this predicament. The speaker is not able to fully explain her difficulties beyond insignificant issues. Hence, she resorts to illusion and exaggerated expressions such as: “I don’t want to be your child”

45. Themes Family relationships Perhaps her parents do shout too much, but the overall impression is one of teen angst coupled with poor empathy from her family. The idea of ‘divorcing’ their parents is one that would appeal to many teenagers at some point - due to failures of communication, empathy and attitude. In modern society, when parents divorce, it can often be the case that children are left feeling powerless. In this poem, it is the child who has the power, not the other way round.

46. Areas of comparison ‘Divorce’ depicts a tension and lack of communication between parent and child which can also be seen in ‘Keeping Orchids’. In a sense one is a reversal of the other. In ‘Divorce’ the daughter wants to ‘give away’ her parents; while in ‘Keeping Orchids’ the daughter feels she has been rejected by her parents who put her up for adoption. The speaker in ‘Divorce’ describes her parents’ annoying habits which upset her. Similarly, in ‘Keeping Orchids’ the mother’s coldness distresses the speaker.

47. Areas of comparison The tone in each poem contrasts greatly however. In ‘Divorce’ the speaker is melodramatic. She exaggerates her emotions and concentrates on herself - repeatedly using “I” . In ‘Keeping Orchids’ Kay remains detached. Rather than the speaker talking about herself directly she uses the orchids as a separate image on which to project her emotions. ‘Divorce’ can also be compared to ‘Bed’. Both are written in dramatic monologue form. Each depicts a strong personality, and both suggest a breakdown in communication feeding resentment between parent(s) and child.

48. What they are like (personality, voice) Create a mind map that shows who the speaker is, what they are like and what they think, feel and desire. Have at least 2 for each category. Find quotes to back up your ideas. Who they are (age, gender, occupation) Example: Dramatic: ‘all you ever say is: / ‘Are you off in the cream puff, Lady Muck?’’ The speaker in ‘Divorce’ Now decide: Do you feel sympathy for the speaker? What they feel What they think What they desire

49. Theme: Parent and Child Relationship Working in pairs, answer these questions: • Do you think the speaker actually has a reason to complain. Why or why not? • What do you think the relationship is really like between the parents and the speaker in this poem? What clues tell you this? • What message do you think the poem has about families and the relationship between parents and children?