LIFE-SPAN DEVELOPMENT

1. 14 A Topical Approach to LIFE-SPAN DEVELOPMENT Families, Lifestyles, and Parenting John W. Santrock

2. Families, Lifestyles, and Parenting • Analyzing Family Life • The Diversity of Adult Life Styles • Parenting • Other Family Relationships

3. Analyzing Family Life The Family Life Cycle Fig. 14.1

4. Analyzing Family Life Multiple Developmental Trajectories • Different trajectories for children and adults – timing of changes • Children: timing of child care and middle school entry • Adults: timing of family tasks and changes • Planned such as delayed marriage • Unplanned such as job loss and divorce • Extensive variability today; traditional stage sequence less relevant and common

5. Analyzing Family Life Family Processes • Recalling Bronfenbrenner’s ecological theory • Microsystem level —reciprocal socialization • Bidirectional: children socialize parents just as parents socialize children • Family as a social system • Sociocultural and historical changes • Effects on family processes

6. Marital relationship Child behavior and development Parenting Analyzing Family Life Direct and Indirect Interactions Between Parents and Children Fig. 14.2

7. The Diversity of Adult Life Styles Single Adults • Being single • Dramatic increase; tripled from 1970 to 2005 • Single stereotypes • Advantages and disadvantages • Common problems • Forming intimate relationships with other adults • Loneliness • Finding niche in marriage oriented society

8. 30 30 25 Percent 20 15 10 0 1970 2000 Year The Diversity of Adult Life Styles Percentage of Single Adults 30 to 34 Years of Age Fig. 14.3

9. The Diversity of Adult Life Styles Cohabiting Adults • Dramatic rise in cohabiting before marriage • Higher in countries other than the U.S. • Cohabiting tends to be short-lived in U.S. • Comparing cohabitation to marriage • Advantages and disadvantages of cohabiting

10. The Diversity of Adult Life Styles Increase in Cohabitation in the U.S. Fig. 14.4

11. The Diversity of Adult Life Styles Cohabiting Adults • Dramatic rise in cohabiting older adults • More for companionship than love • Expected to continue increasing • Separate assets best when one needs expensive care • More stable, positive relationship than young cohabitating couples • More depressed than married counterparts

12. The Diversity of Adult Life Styles Married Adults • Marital trends • Changing male-female equality in marriage has created more fragile, intense marital relationships • More adults remain single longer • U.S. still a marrying society; divorce rates slowing • Culture influences marriage • International comparisons in marriage

13. 27 26 25 24 Age (years) 23 22 21 20 19 1950 1960 1970 1980 1990 2002 Year The Diversity of Adult Life Styles Increase in Age at 1st Marriage in U.S. Fig. 14.5

14. Establishing love maps Nurturing fondness and admiration Turning toward each other instead of away Letting your partner influence you Solving solvable conflicts Overcoming gridlock Creating shared meaning The Diversity of Adult Life Styles What Makes Marriages Work

15. Premarital education Improves quality of marriage May reduce risk of divorce Linked to higher level of commitment to spouse and lower level of destructive marital conflict Benefits of a good marriage Healthier lives Lower levels of depression, anxiety, anger The Diversity of Adult Life Styles What Makes Marriages Work

16. The Diversity of Adult Life Styles Marriage in Middle and Late Adulthood • Middle Adulthood • Most marrieds express considerable satisfaction • Late Adulthood • Widowhood and adjustment • Adjustments needed at retirement • Happiness affected by each partner’s coping with aging • Divorced adults

17. The Diversity of Adult Life Styles Divorced Adults • If divorce occurs, it usually happens early in marriage • Stress of separation and divorce pose risks for psychological and physical difficulties • Psychiatric disorders and hospital admission • Clinical depression and alcoholism • Psychosomatic disorders • Custodial and non-custodial parents: economics and gender have varying effects

18. 10 8 6 Percent of divorcees 4 2 0 5 10 15 20 25 30 35 Years married The Diversity of Adult Life Styles Divorce Rate in Relation to Number of Years Married Fig. 14.6

19. The Diversity of Adult Life Styles Dealing With Divorce • A chance for personal growth • Make decisions carefully • Focus more on the future than on past • Use your strengths and resources • Don’t expect success, happiness in all you do • You’re never trapped by one pathway

20. The Diversity of Adult Life Styles Divorced in Middle and Older Adults • Main reason for staying married: children • Main causes of divorce • For women • Verbal, physical, emotional abuse • Alcohol or drug abuse • Cheating • For men • No obvious problems, just fell out of love • Cheating • Different values, lifestyles

21. The Diversity of Adult Life Styles Remarried Adults • Complex histories and multiple relationships make adjustment difficult • Men remarry sooner than women • Stepfamilies face unique tasks • Many remarry for financial reasons, not love • Strategies: have realistic expectations and develop new positive relationships within family • Remarriage and Aging

22. The Diversity of Adult Life Styles Gay and Lesbian Adults • Similar in satisfactions and need to find balance as heterosexual couples • Satisfactions: loves, joys, conflicts • Needs: romantic love, affection, autonomy, equality • More flexible in gender roles than heterosexuals • Prefer long term, committed relationships • Lesbians usually do not have open relationships • Increasingly creating families with children

23. The Diversity of Adult Life Styles Amount of Same Sex Couples with Children Fig. 14.7

24. Parenting Parental Roles • Many plan to be parents; others are startled • Needs and expectations stimulate myths • Timing of parenthood • Advantages of having children early and later • Transition to parenting requires adapting • Choices of how to become parents • Career and role decisions

25. Parenting Parents As Managers • Provide opportunities, monitor, act as social arrangers for children • Teach child to be independent, make competent decisions • Serve as regulators of children • Effective management produces best outcomes

26. Power Assertion, Induction, and Withdrawal of Love Power Assertion: intended to stop undesirable behavior though physical or verbal enforcement of parental control; includes demands, threats, withdrawal of privileges, spankings. Generally induces fear. Least effective. Induction: encourage desirable behavior (or discourage undesirable behavior) by reasoning with child; includes setting limits, demonstrating logical consequences, explaining, discussion, getting ideas from child about what is fair. Most effective.

27. Power Assertion, Induction, and Withdrawal of Love Withdrawal of Love:may include ignoring, isolating, showing dislike for child. Psychological Aggression • Verbal attacks that may result in psychological harm; yelling, screaming, swearing, threatening to spank, threatening to kick out of house. Occurs in at least 2/10 households, likely 4-5/10 • 20% parents of toddlers engage in • 50% among parents of teens

28. Parenting Styles Authoritarian • High on control but low on responsiveness • Characterized by low warmth • Little positive involvement with their children • Set rigid rules • Discipline harshly • Expect obey because of parental authority

29. Parenting Styles Authoritative • Show warm, responsive involvement • Set appropriate and clear standards • Communicate openly • Provide rationale for rules • Show respect for children’s rights and opinions • Encourage autonomy and independence, resulting in social competence

30. Parenting Styles Permissive-Indulgent • Highly warm and responsive • Place few demands or expectations • Rules that exist are not clearly communicated or enforced so children left to make own decisions and regulate own behavior

31. Parenting Styles Permissive-Indifferent • Leave children alone to make their own decisions and control own behavior • Place few demands, neglectful • Appearing emotionally detached, show little or no involvement in their children’s lives

32. Consequences of Parenting Styles (Baumrind) Authoritative: Self-reliance Social responsibility Higher levels of achievement Authoritarian: Social incompetence Anxiety about social comparison Failure to show initiative Poor communication skills Lower school performance Lower self-esteem

33. Consequences of Parenting Styles (Baumrind) Permissive-indulgent: • Expect to get their own way • Show little respect for others • Never learn to control their own behavior • Lower school performance Permissive-Indifferent: • Social incompetence • Lack of self-control • Lower school performance However, no one right way to raise children. Cause-effect not demonstrated (e.g., parent style causing child’s incompetence- consider innate factors, temperament)

34. Restrictive, punitive style; parents exhort child to follow their directions and respect their work and effort Authoritarian Encourages children to be independent but still places limits and controls on their actions Authoritative Neglectful Parent very uninvolved in child’s life Parents very involved with children, place few demands/controls on them Indulgent Parenting Baumrind’s Parenting Styles

35. Parenting Classification of Parenting Styles Fig. 14.8

36. Parenting Parenting Styles in Context • Authoritative parenting linked to competence across wide range of • Ethnic groups • Social strata • Cultures • Family structures • Most associated with positive child outcomes in ethnic studies

37. Parenting Punishment and Discipline • Historically, corporal punishment considered necessity and desirable for disciplining child • Legal in all states; used by majority of parents • Favored most in U.S. and Canada • Few research studies on physical punishment • Strong emotional support by parents reduced link between spanking and children’s problems

38. Parenting Punishment and Discipline • Corporal punishment by parents associated with • Higher levels of immediate compliance • Increased aggression among children • Lower levels of moral internalization and mental health • Sweden outlawed physical spanking of a child in 1979 • Youth rates of delinquency, alcohol use, rape, and suicide dropped

39. Parenting Factors Linked to Child Abuse • Marital conflict and individual hosility linked to physical punishment • Co-parenting – poor coordination places child at risk • Child maltreatment • Almost 900,000 in 2002 • 84% abused by parents • Mandatory reporting for professionals

40. Parenting Types of Child Maltreatment Physical abuse Infliction of physical injury Failure to provide basic needs Child neglect Fondling child’s genitals, sodomy, intercourse, incest, exhibitionism, rape, and commercial exploitation Sexual abuse Acts or omissions by parents or other caregivers that have caused, or could cause, serious behavioral, cognitive, or emotional problems Emotionalabuse

41. Parenting Context of Abuse • No single factor is total cause • Violence in American culture through media, etc. • Family member interactions • Perpetuating history: parents abused as children • Developmental consequences • Emotional and relational/attachment problems • Personality problems and risk of suicide • Aggressive behaviors and substance use/abuse

42. Parenting Autonomy and Attachment between Adolescents and Parents • Good parenting takes time and effort • Conflict when adolescents push for autonomy; gradual release of control is best • Gender and culture affect seeking and granting autonomy • Parent-child attachment remains important

43. Parenting Parent-Adolescent Conflict • Conflict with parents escalates in early adolescence • Biological changes of puberty • Cognitive changes and idealism • Social changes and independence • Maturational changes • Violated expectations • Some cultures marked by less conflict

44. Parenting Competent Adolescent Development • Enhanced when the parents… • Show them warmth and mutual respect • Demonstrate sustained interest in their lives • Recognize and adapt to their cognitive and socio-emotional development • Communication high standards and expectations • Deal constructively with conflict and problems

45. Parenting Emerging Adult Development • Relationships with parents improve • Grow closer psychologically • Share more • Some emerging adult decisions may be troublesome for parents • Advantages and disadvantages to living in parents’ home

46. Parenting Working Parents • Work has positive and negative effects on parenting • Effects of mother working in first year on child’s later development is still debated • Parents over-investing in children can have negative effects • Division of time for more chores and children • One- versus two-parent household • Latchkey children and out-of-school programs

47. Parenting Effects of Divorce on Children • Children • More likely to show poorer adjustment • More likely to have academic and behavioral problems • Overall adjustment affected by social maturity, gender, temperament, custody situation, SES • Adjustment improves if • conflicts reduced by divorce • parents harmonious and authoritative

48. Parenting Single-Parent Families in Different Countries Fig. 14.10

49. Parenting Communicating with Children About Divorce • Explain separation • Separation not child’s fault • May take time to feel better • Keep door open for further discussion • Provide as much continuity as possible • Provide support for children and yourself

50. Parenting Divorce and Children’s Emotional Problems Fig. 14.11